Don’t Be an Asshole: common decency and running a tech company
Ryan Barry runs a tech company on a simple rule: don't be an asshole. We talk about fatherhood, ADHD, and what it's like to be the fourth child in your own house.
Ryan Barry has three core values he's teaching his kids: find what makes you happy, show up and work hard, and don’t be an asshole. This comes from growing up lower middle class with an immigrant mother and a construction worker dad. That background gave him an intense work ethic, to work like someone is coming to take it all away, and a deep sense of inclusivity. He says his VP of marketing once told him he was too inclusive.
He calls himself Peter Pan and the fourth child in his house, an adult who has decided not to grow up. That energy shows up at work too. A colleague once told him that if he’s in a bad mood, the whole company feels it. He has ADHD, which can cause what he calls a flood of anxious thoughts. When that happens, he gets outside and goes for a walk.
He wasn't always this self aware. For years he just ran through walls nonstop until he hit burnout. He credits his executive coach, who he calls 'business speak for a therapist,' with helping him learn to slow down and build new muscles. Now he sets boundaries, like pretending the WiFi is broken on Saturdays or leaving his phone behind for a whole day.
“Find what makes you happy. Show up and work hard and don't be an asshole.”
Notes
- His three rules for his kids are: find what makes you happy, show up and work hard, and don’t be an asshole.
- He grew up lower middle class with an immigrant mother and a construction worker father, which he says shaped his work ethic and inclusivity.
- Diagnosed with ADHD as a kid, he deals with what he calls a 'flood' of anxiety by getting outside or doing breathing exercises.
- He credits his executive coach, 'business speak for a therapist,' with helping him avoid burnout after years of 'running through walls'.