F*ck It Let’s Be Awkward: criticize culture or create it
Nikki Ivey on the wigs she spent years suppressing, the extra confidence Black women are expected to manufacture, and why sellers should create culture instead of just criticizing it.
Nikki is a writer first. That love of words became a sales career, a LinkedIn Top Voice, and SDRDefenders. But the part of our conversation I keep coming back to is how much energy she spent editing herself as the only Black woman in the room. Even something as personal and joyful as changing her hair with wigs became another decision to manage around other people's expectations.
We talked about the narratives that can enter a room before she does, and the extra work it takes to reach the same baseline of confidence other sellers get to start with. Nikki separates structural exclusion from the interpersonal kind without pretending either one is simple. Her way through the backlash around inclusion is practical: skip the shame, notice how your behavior lands, and be willing to say the clumsy thing in a space where everyone is trying to grow in the same direction.
Her challenge to sellers is the point of the episode. Nothing happens until something gets sold, which means salespeople have more power over culture than they tend to admit. You can criticize the culture around you, or you can use the same skills that move buyers and build communities to create something better.
“You can criticize culture or you can create it, and sellers are built to create.”
Notes
- Words, wigs, and women in charge are the three threads Nikki uses to explain who she is.
- She spent years suppressing hair as a form of expression while working as the only Black woman in the room.
- SDRDefenders and Sales for the Culture gave Black and brown sellers a place to be vulnerable when they needed it most.
- Her advice for moving through inclusion backlash is to care about how your behavior lands and leave room for imperfect conversations.